Political Life

Sunday, April 26, 2015 – Political Life

He knows nothing; and he thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career. ~ George Bernard Shaw, Major Barbara

Our great democracies still tend to think that a stupid man is more likely to be honest than a clever man, and our politicians take advantage of this prejudice by pretending to be even more stupid than nature made them. ~ Bertrand Russell, New Hopes for a Changing World

Watch a man – say, a politician – being interviewed on television, and you are observing a demonstration of what both he and his interrogators learned in school: all questions have answers, and it is a good thing to give an answer even if there is none to give, even if you don’t understand the question, even if the question contains erroneous assumptions, even if you are ignorant of the facts required to answer. Have you ever heard a man being interviewed say, “I don’t have the faintest idea,” or “I don’t know enough even to guess,” or “I have been asked that question before, but all my answers to it seem to be wrong?” One does not “blame” men, especially if they are politicians, for providing instant answers to all questions. The public requires that they do, since the public has learned that instant answer giving is the most important sign of an educated man. ~ Neil Postman

Politicians were mostly people who’d had too little morals and ethics to stay lawyers. ~ George R. R. Martin, Ace in the Hole

Politics is so difficult that it’s generally only people who aren’t quite up to the task who feel convinced they are ~ Alain de Botton

I remain just one thing, and one thing only, and that is a clown. It places me on a far higher plane than any politician. ~ Charlie Chaplin

If you put your politicians up for sale, as the US does (alone in this among industrialized democracies), then someone will buy them – and it won’t be you; you can’t afford them. ~ Juan Cole

Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build bridges even when there are no rivers. ~ Nikita Khrushchev

Whether we and our politicians know it or not, Nature is party to all our deals and decisions, and she has more votes, a longer memory, and a sterner sense of justice than we do. ~ Wendell Berry

People are so docile right now. It is almost as if good government means when the politicians lie to us for our own good, for the public good, and bad government is when politicians lie for their own selfish interests. ~ James Bovard

Ninety percent of the politicians give the other ten percent a bad reputation. ~ Henry Kissinger

Among politicians the esteem of religion is profitable; the principles of it are troublesome. ~ Benjamin Whichcote

All of us who are concerned for peace and triumph of reason and justice must be keenly aware how small an influence reason and honest good will exert upon events in the political field. ~ Albert Einstein

Under democracy one party always devotes its chief energies to trying to prove that the other party is unfit to rule – and both commonly succeed, and are right. ~ H. L. Mencken

Take our politicians: they’re a bunch of yo-yos. The presidency is now a cross between a popularity contest and a high school debate, with an encyclopedia of clichés the first prize. ~ Saul Bellow

In order to become the master, the politician poses as the servant. ~ Charles de Gaulle

Liberalism is trust of the people tempered by prudence. Conservatism is distrust of the people tempered by fear. ~ William E. Gladstone

An election is coming. Universal peace is declared, and the foxes have a sincere interest in prolonging the lives of the poultry. ~ George Eliot

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy. ~ Ernest Benn

We have, I fear, confused power with greatness. ~ Stewart Udall

The modern conservative is engaged in one of man’s oldest exercises in moral philosophy; that is, the search for a superior moral justification for selfishness. ~ John Kenneth Galbraith

A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who, however, has never learned how to walk forward. ~ Franklin D. Roosevelt

Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel. ~ John Quinton

A conservative is a man who believes that nothing should be done for the first time. ~ Alfred E. Wiggam

A conservative is one who admires radicals centuries after they’re dead. ~ Leo Rosten

The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn’t work and then they get elected and prove it. ~ P. J. O’Rourke

The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management skills of celery. They’re the kind of people who’d stop to help you change a flat, but would somehow manage to set your car on fire. I would be reluctant to entrust them with a Cuisinart, let alone the economy. The Republicans, on the other hand, would know how to fix your tire, but they wouldn’t bother to stop because they’d want to be on time for Ugly Pants Night at the country club. ~ Dave Barry

Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others. ~ Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary

Conservatism is the policy of make no change and consult your grandmother when in doubt. ~ Woodrow Wilson

Every two years the American politics industry fills the airwaves with the most virulent, scurrilous, wall-to-wall character assassination of nearly every political practitioner in the country – and then declares itself puzzled that America has lost trust in its politicians. ~ Charles Krauthammer

I’m not a leftist; I’m where the righteous ought to be. ~ M. M. Cody

Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks. ~ Doug Larson

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other. ~ Oscar Ameringer

Do you ever get the feeling that the only reason we have elections is to find out if the polls were right? ~ Robert Orben

The best thing about this group of candidates is that only one of them can win. ~ Will Rogers

Members of Congress should be compelled to wear uniforms like NASCAR drivers, so we could identify their corporate sponsors. ~ Caroline Baum

There are far too many men in politics and not enough elsewhere. ~ Hermione Gingold

All people are born alike – except Republicans and Democrats. ~ Groucho Marx

If voting changed anything, they’d make it illegal. ~ Emma Goldman

A political leader is necessarily an imposter since he believes in solving life’s problems without asking its question. ~ André Malraux

It is not in the nature of politics that the best men should be elected. The best men do not want to govern their fellowmen. ~ George E. MacDonald

Politicians as a class are dangerous, that people who are seeking power over us are not, by definition, our friends. ~ James Bovard

I think musicians can better run this state than politicians. And, hell, beauticians can better run the state than politicians. ~ Kinky Friedman

He’s suffering from Politicians’ Logic. Something must be done, this is something, therefore we must do it. ~ Antony Jay

I am never going to have anything more to do with politics or politicians. When this war is over I shall confine myself entirely to writing and painting. ~ Winston Churchill

It has been the great fault of our politicians that they have all wanted to do something. ~ Anthony Trollope

Like its politicians and its war, society has the teenagers it deserves. ~ Joseph Priestley

Of course I’m respectable. I’m old. Politicians, ugly buildings, and whores all get respectable if they last long enough. ~ Robert Towne

Politicians who wear little tennis socks with the balls at the back should not be taken seriously. ~ Mo Rocca

It does no harm just once in a while to acknowledge that the whole country isn’t in flames, that there are people in the country besides politicians, entertainers, and criminals. ~ Charles Kuralt