Be a Good Guest

Sunday, July 29, 2012 – Be a Good Guest

If it were not for guests all houses would be graves. ~ Kahlil Gibran

Visitors are insatiable devourers of time, and fit only for those who, if they did not visit, would do nothing. ~ William Cowper

I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn’t forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn’t take anything that is mine. ~ Alfred North Whitehead

Staying with people consists in your not having your own way, and their not having theirs. ~ Maarten Maartens

Santa Claus has the right idea: Visit people once a year. ~ Victor Borge

We dare not trust our wit for making our house pleasant to our friend, so we buy ice cream. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

My evening visitors, if they cannot see the clock should find the time in my face. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

To buy very good wine nowadays requires only money. To serve it to your guests is a sign of fatigue. ~ William F. Buckley, Jr.

Even today, well-brought-up English girls are taught by their mothers to boil all veggies for at least a month and a half, just in case one of the dinner guests turns up without his teeth. ~ Calvin Trillin

Mighty proud I am that I am able to have a spare bed for my friends. ~ Samuel Pepys

Fish and visitors smell in three days. ~ Benjamin Franklin

House guests should be regarded as perishables: Leave them out too long and they go bad. ~ Erma Bombeck

A dinner invitation, once accepted, is a sacred obligation. If you die before the dinner takes place, your executor must attend. ~ Ward McAllister

Hospitality, n. The virtue which induces us to feed and lodge certain persons who are not in need of food and lodging. ~ Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary, 1911

Dessert is probably the most important stage of the meal, since it will be the last thing your guests remember before they pass out all over the table. ~ William Powell

Humility is a virtue, and it is a virtue innate in guests. ~ Max Beerbohm

In the end we’re all Jerry Springer Show guests, really, we just haven’t been on the show. ~ Marilyn Manson

People are far more sincere and good-humored at speeding their parting guests than on meeting them. ~ Anton Chekhov

When any one of our relations was found to be a person of a very bad character, a troublesome guest, or one we desired to get rid of, upon his leaving my house I ever took care to lend him a riding-coat, or a pair of boots, or sometimes a horse of small value, and I always had the satisfaction of finding he never came back to return them. ~ Oliver Goldsmith

Whoever is admitted or sought for, in company, upon any other account than that of his merit and manners, is never respected there, but only made use of. We will have such-a-one, for he sings prettily; we will invite such-a-one to a ball, for he dances well; we will have such-a-one at supper, for he is always joking and laughing; we will ask another because he plays deep at all games, or because he can drink a great deal. These are all vilifying distinctions, mortifying preferences, and exclude all ideas of esteem and regard. Whoever is had (as it is called) in company for the sake of any one thing singly, is singly that thing, and will never be considered in any other light; consequently never respected, let his merits be what they will. ~ Lord Chesterfield

To be an ideal guest, stay at home. ~ Edgar Watson Howe

Making a long stay short is a great aid to popularity. ~ Kin Hubbard

Superior people never make long visits. ~ Marianne Moore


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