The Weird

JUST ABOVE SUNSET offers, in special arrangement with Andrew J. Hewett and his site WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (chewednews.com), the best of the weird, bizarre and unusual. As noted at his site, Andrew publishes, via e-mail, a growing archive of true events compiled from a variety of sources, covering “every conceivable subject.” You can submit your own favorite “strange story” – including a verifiable source, of course. He’s sent over 1,200 of these out to the distribution list, and you too can sign up to be on the list. Here’s the latest. Visit his site for more, and the archives. And note that Volume I of Weird, Bizarre and Unusual [Kindle Edition] is available on Amazon.com – Volume II will be coming soon, with Volume III, IV and V to follow.

Thursday, August 27, 2015 –

SUICIDAL DOGS?

For reasons no one has been able to explain, the century-old bridge next to Gothic castle Overtoun House, in Dunbartonshire, Scotland, attracts suicides… by dogs. Of some 600 animals which have jumped from that bridge, about 50 died. (http://www.latest-news-headlines.eu/article/mystery-as-600-dogs-jump-from-039-haunted-suicide-bridge-039-leaving-many-dead/1116420)

TOO BIG FOR YOUR BRITCHES?

Do you wear tight jeans? Doctors in Australia report a 35-year-old woman was hospitalized for four days after experiencing muscle damage, swelling, and nerve blockages in her legs, after squatting several hours while wearing tight-fitting denims. Tight jeans have previously been reported to cause nerve lesions in the groin but not the kind of nerve problems in the lower leg and severe muscle damage they saw in this patient. They believe her condition was caused by the combination of squatting and tight jeans. (http://www.latimes.com/science/sciencenow/la-sci-sn-skinny-jeans-health-hazard-20150622-story.html)

HE NEEDS TO GET A LIFE

At 4:00 am, August 26, 2015, Charles Troutman, turned on his red and blue flashing lights and pulled over a motorist on Interstate 30, in Dallas, Texas. Problem was, Troutman is a non-policeman; but the driver he pulled over was. He was arrested, charged with impersonating a public servant and possession of marijuana. (http://crimeblog.dallasnews.com/2015/08/dallas-police-22-year-old-in-dirty-pickup-tried-to-pull-over-a-real-officer-at-4-in-the-morning.html/)

LIGHTS-OUT DURING INTIMACY?

Ladies, would you rather have a handsome, dishonest, unfaithful mate, or an ugly, loving, good-hearted man? Perhaps the most unattractive man in all of Uganda, Godfrey Baguma, 47, said when he met his wife to be, Kate Namanda, now 30, she was 18. Fearing his homely face would make her family separate them, the couple was not publicly married until 2013; though they produced six children. (http://metro.co.uk/2015/06/22/ugandas-ugliest-man-has-become-a-father-for-the-eighth-time-5257601/)

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDINGS

(A) “A printing error last week caused confusion. The price for this smartly modemized semi-detached horse is $53,000.” (B) “It is said that there are more golf curses per square mile in North Carolina than anywhere else in the world.” (C) “Guilt, vengeance, and bitterness can be emotionally destructive to you and your children. You must get rid of them.”

STRAIGHT FROM ‘SPIGOT’ BETTER?

A growing market on the internet is human breast milk. From an article in the Journal of the Royal Society of Medicine, specialists say there is little evidence supporting claims that human milk is some kind of super food which boost health and fitness and wards off disease. It could even be unhealthy, exposing consumers to infectious diseases like hepatitis, HIV and syphilis. Fetishes were not mentioned. (http://news.yahoo.com/online-human-breast-milk-craze-serious-health-risks-230725328.html)

HE HAS VERY STICKY-FINGERS

Englishman Michael Claydon apparently has absolutely no scruples when it comes to stealing. On May 16, 2015, he broke into his sister’s home and swiped £10 and perfume from her, then took £3 from his five-year old nephew’s savings, in his Batman wallet. Before that, he’d taken: cash from a toilet vending machine; 24 cans of beer from a shop; sunglasses, clothes and aftershave from a parked car; money and aftershave from his mother’s home. So far, at age 23, he has 43 offences on record. (http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/meanest-man-britain-uncle-jailed-5922167)

AN OVER-CROWDED INFANT

A baby born in Guangzhou, China, April 15, 2014, weighed 3 kilograms (6.6 Lbs.). But after surgery removed 0.6 kilograms (1.3 Lbs.), the infant only weighed 5.3 Lbs. What was removed? The baby born suffered a “parasitic fetus” – a conjoined twin without a head. That extra weight was two extra arms and two extra legs. (http://www.globaltimes.cn/content/854259.shtml#.U01OkuZdWDE)

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDINGS

(A) “People who use birth control methods that smoke a lot are in danger having retarded children.” (B) “Political insiders call them emotional issues like social security for Democrats and capital punishment for Republicans.” (C) “Katherine Innes, as the virgin in this year’s production of the Passion Play, has already started her rehearsal. She is the first blond virgin for a century.”

Wednesday, August 26, 2015 –

“FLASHERS” BY THE DOZENS

On a cold April 1999 morning, New York City artist Spencer Tunick, 32, was arrested and his camera confiscated. That’s because he’d convinced 150 people to pose nude for him in Times Square. He was charged with unlawful assembly, which means he failed to have proper permits for a parade or demonstration. Mr. Tunick claimed he was working on what he called the Naked States Tour, where he persuades volunteers to pose nude in public. (http://www.nytimes.com/1999/04/26/nyregion/artist-arrested-after-150-people-pose-nude-for-him-in-times-sq.html)

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDINGS

(A) “Mr. Benjamin Porter visited the school yesterday and lectured on ‘Destructive Pests.’ A large number were present.” (B) Columbia, Tennessee, which calls itself the largest outdoor mule market in the world, held a mule parade yesterday headed by the Governor. (C) Zimbabwe Rhodesian guerrilla leaders demanded Monday that a Commonwealth peace-keeping force of several thousand men – one with teeth – be sent to enforce a cease-fire in the war against their forces.

70 SHEEP/30 GOATS =100 SENATORS

Felix Kiprono, a lawyer in Nairobi, Kenya, has his eye on someone special: President Obama’s daughter Malia, who has Kenyan roots. He has offered the President 50 cows, 70 sheep and 30 goats. “People might say I am after the family’s money, which is not the case. My love is real,” he told the Nairobian newspaper. (http://www.cnn.com/2015/05/27/living/feat-malia-obama-kenyan-lawyer/)

FUN FOR FREE, FELLOWS

An Austrian newspaper recently showed a picture of men lined-up outside a Vienna brothel to enjoy “Free Entrance! Free Drinks! Free Sex!” The owner, Hermann Mueller, said he’d paid nearly 5 million euros in taxes in Salzburg alone over the past decade, and that was enough. He also promised to pay all his girls’ 10,000 euros ($11,270) a month salary. (http://news.yahoo.com/austrian-brothel-offers-free-sex-tax-protest-101612361.html)

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDINGS

(A) “An owner of a Greenwich Village barbershop survived being shot in the neck as he slept by a gunman who broke into his house… ” – The New York Times (B) “Taking new technology into unexplored realms of the earth is a once in a lifetime opportunity that I hope to repeat many times.” – Underwater USA (3) “An investigation found the employee occasionally slept on duty for almost five years.” – York, Pennsylvania, Daily Record.

BET HE GOT HIRED QUICKLY

SYRACUSE, N.Y. – On June 15, 2015, Quante Wright went to work at Lowery Brothers Chrysler Jeep. He sold a 2015 Jeep Cherokee. Then he was fired. That’s because, the day before, his story had been released (on Syracuse.com) reflecting his ability go from a gang member to prison; to a college graduate; to a successful salesman. (http://www.syracuse.com/news/index.ssf/2015/06/car_dealer_fires_former_gang_member_after_syracusecom_story_about_his_success.html)

Sunday, August 23, 2015

ALCOHOL IS A DEADLY DRUG

According to Jim Landers in the Dallas Morning News (June 16, 2015) – (1) Just over 4% of U.S. deaths stem from alcohol use. (2) In Russia over 30% of deaths are caused by alcohol consumption. (3) Worldwide, alcohol use is responsible for 3.3 million deaths yearly, more than HIV, tuberculosis and violence combined. (http://www.dallasnews.com/business/columnists/jim-landers/20150615-landers-heavy-drinking-up-and-so-are-the-costs.ece)

QUOTES FROM DONALD TRUMP

(A) ”Sorry losers and haters, but my I.Q. is one of the highest – and you all know it! Please don’t feel so stupid or insecure – it’s not your fault.” (B) “While Bette Midler is an extremely unattractive woman, I refuse to say that because I always insist on being politically correct.” (C) “If Obama resigns from office NOW, thereby doing a great service to the country – I will give him free lifetime golf at any one of my courses!” (http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/10-weirdest-donald-trump-tweets-5899833)

“PLEASED HIMSELF” WITH CASH

Aaron Stein, 35, faces nine felony counts of aggravated assault, robbery, threatening to use a weapon of mass destruction and possessing a facsimile weapon of mass destruction. That’s because while robbing a Pittsburgh area bank, Stein “stated he had a bomb, showed the teller wires hanging out from his shirt and demanded cash.” The bomb turned out to be a plain box and his “gun” an adult sex toy. (http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/pittsburgh-man-charged-robbing-bank-sex-toy-n376096)

HER TATTOO GOT SCARED

After Paul Boye was sentenced to prison in Nebraska for shooting and wounding his ex-girlfriend, Andrea Eberspacher, he was told he’d also have to give her $20,000 and help pay medical bills. This extra was because doctors had ruined her “happiness is a warm gun” tattoo, while providing life-saving surgery. (http://www.foxnews.com/us/2015/06/13/judge-man-who-marred-nebraska-woman-warm-gun-tattoo-in-shooting-must-pay/)

HUMAN BRAINS ARE HEALTH FOOD

A study published Wednesday (June 10, 2015) in the scientific journal Nature found that people of Papua New Guinea’s Fore tribe who in the past had eaten brains of family members at funerals are now resistant to a rare, degenerative brain disease called Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease (CJD).

STRAIGHT OR GAY? OKAY

Showing how times are changing, when Maxwell Barrett, 18, a senior at Raritan High School in Hazlet, N.J., tweeted his yearbook picture and quote, “Of course I dress well, I didn’t spend all that time in the closet for nothing,” he was applauded and cheered for sharing his gayness. (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/06/11/maxwell-barrett-senior-quote_n_7564018.html)

TOILET PAPER WORTH MORE

While U.S. currency is almost the most valuable in the world, Zimbabwe’s central bank says their old banknotes, which collapsed and were discarded, are still valued at a rate of 100,000,000,000,000 Zimbabwean dollars to $0.40 U.S. Zimbabwe’s cash system is ruled now by South African’s rand and U.S. dollar; an inflation rate in 2009 of 230,000,000% left no choice. (http://indianexpress.com/article/world/middle-east-africa/100-trillion-old-zimbabwean-dollars-will-fetch-only-40-us-cents/)

NO NEED TO STAGGER INSIDE

Citizens of the United States have many freedoms, many fought for to keep in place. An Iowa woman, Patience Payne, 29, won her right, now that a judge says she cannot be prosecuted for public intoxication. Her arrest in 2013 was thrown out because it was determined she had the right to get or be drunk on her own front porch. (http://www.upi.com/Top_News/US/2015/06/13/Iowa-Supreme-Court-Its-OK-to-be-drunk-on-your-front-porch/6831434204829/)

HE COULDN’T CALL AAA

According to Houston’s KBMT-TV, James Rogers, 72, and his little dog, Leia, were found dead in front of a Waffle House, inside his 2007 Chevy Corvette. Apparently a battery cable came loose, making it impossible to operate any power, including unlocking the doors, leaving them to die from heat. Rogers had accidentally left his cell phone inside the restaurant. (There is a manual release on the floorboard, but most people do not know about it.) (http://ktla.com/2015/06/11/elderly-man-dog-die-because-car-doors-wouldnt-unlock/)

WHAT ABOUT GAY RESEARCHERS?

Nobel Prizewinner, British scientist Tim Hunt, 72, upset some folks saying before a World Conference of Science Journalist, women working with men in laboratories hamper achievements. Quote: “…you fall in love with them, they fall in love with you, and when you criticize them, they cry.” Last heard, public outcry had caused him to resign his post at University College London. (http://presstv.ir/Detail/2015/06/11/415403/UK-scientist-in-gender-row-quits)

THEY “SKIRTED” THE REQUIREMENT

Andria Green, 8, and her 7-year-old sister, Zoey, of Overton, Texas, were running a successful lemonade stand in front of their home, until a policeman demanded they get a permit. And, though the city waived the $150 fee, the health department needed to inspect. So, rather than go through that, the young ladies simply gave their lemonade away for “cash donations.” (http://www.kltv.com/story/29290704/police-video-shows-officer-questioning-about-lemonade-stand-permit)

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDING

“There isn’t room to list them all, except it must be noted that they included the Right to Die Society apologizing for accidentally calling itself the Right to Life Society in a previous letter, and the Right to Life Society objecting to the theft of its name.” – From the Toronto Star, 6 February 1993.

“I’LL DIE IF IT KILLS ME”

Kabhir Ahmed, an ISIS trainee, revealed to BBC’s Panorama that he was on a ‘waiting list’ to become a suicide bomber. To Jihadists, these ‘martyrdom operations’ are considered a high honor. A pro-Isis preacher in Russia has reportedly complained that senior Saudi militants are letting their friends & family jump the queue to become suicide bombers first.

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDINGS

(A) Keyes… said she sees a need for the police department, but feels the three officers the city had (reduced from five) is too many and 1½ would be more sufficient.” – The World, Coos Bay, Oregon. (B) “3 year old teacher needed for pre-school. Experienced preferred.” – The DeLand-Sun News (C) “And as for that better mousetrap, the X-terminator ($1) is humane – the mouse is trapped, not killed – and can be reused.” – Philadelphia Inquirer.

MUST HAVE REALLY UGLY BODIES?

A quote from The Seattle Times/AP: “Police have detained four Westerners accused of posing naked to take photos on a Malaysian mountain – an act that has been blamed for causing the earthquake that killed 18 climbers last week.” (http://www.seattletimes.com/nation-world/malaysia-detains-4-accused-of-posing-naked-at-quake-hit-peak/)

FROM MINOR TO MAJOR

In March 2007, while practicing shooting with his .22-caliber rifle, a Southeast Texas man, James Freeman, shot a bird sitting on a fence. This caused Texas Parks and Wildlife game warden Justin Hurst to attempt to ticket Freeman, who jumped in his truck and drove away. Authorities gave chase and Freeman, after firing nearly 40 shots, struck Hurst dead. Freeman ended up on death row, where his latest appeal, in 2015, was denied by a federal appeals court. (http://www.ooyuz.com/geturl?aid=6816425)

HE GOT A SHELL THEN CELL

A Texas woman, Stacey Swayze-Krampota, was moving to another home when her 5-year-old pet tortoise, Gracie, escaped. Seeing one of Stacey’s many fliers pleading for information, Joseph Urbino, 34, who found Gracie, decided to hold the little slow-mover for ransom – demanding $1,000. This got policed involved, who found Urbino had two outstanding warrants for sexual assault of a child, and he was arrested. (http://www.click2houston.com/news/missing-tortoise-leads-to-arrest-of-man-wanted-for-sexual-assault/34687376)

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDINGS

(A) “Our manager was held hostage at gun point for six hours in a police auction.” – May 31, 1985 issue of Sh’ma. (B) He told state police he had sex with a 25-year-old woman, but it was “not a rape.” A story in Monday’s Times incorrectly said that Zaroff told troopers sex with the woman was “not that great.” (C) “We consider pornography to be a public problem, and we feel it is an issue that demands a second look.” – In a speech by President Ronald Reagan May 21, 1984.

Saturday, August 15, 2015 –

AGAIN, JUSTICE IS AMBIGUOUS

After 10 years sitting on Texas’ death row, Alfred Dewayne Brown, now 33, is free, given another chance to prove his innocence. What gave his life back? A homicide investigator in the case was cleaning out his garage, when he found telephone records justifying a new trial. (http://www.nbcdfw.com/news/local/Murder-Charge-Dismissed-for-Houston-Man-on-Death-Row-306540491.html)

A TAX DEDUCTION ANYONE?

Authorities in Georgia say they received more than 100 calls about an ad on Craigslist: “6 months pregnant, don’t want it. Willing to trade it for $ or drugs. Guaranteed white, so don’t come at me cheap, serious offers only.” Last heard, the Georgia Bureau of Investigation was still trying to learn whether the ad was a prank. (http://www.wsbtv.com/news/news/local/gbi-investigating-atlanta-craigslist-ad-sell-unbor/nmWBw/)

WHAT A WAY TO GO!

Donna Marie Lange, 50, was right on top of things inside the mobile home she and her boyfriend shared in Everett, Washington, when he died. That’s because, with very large breasts, she’d sprawled on him during an argument until he suffocated to death. (http://www.nydailynews.com/news/crime/woman-allegedly-smothers-boyfriend-breasts-article-1.1241258)

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDINGS

(A) “Mr. Martin Shore was born in Madison, Wisconsin, where he died and later moved to Peoria.” – Obituary in a Peoria, Illinois, newspaper. (B) “A modern-dress version of the virgin birth is inconceivable.” MPBN News, May 10, 1985. (C) “We serve a classic Tuscan meal that includes a Florentine terrine made with dick and chicken livers…” – the New York Post, 29 December 1986.

A HORSE-OF-COURSE-OF-COURSE

Though Ruth Dwyer liked attention enough to run for office in her state of Vermont, she appreciated privacy at home. After 40 years with no neighbors, someone built a home next door. She planted a line of trees to shield her property, but they needed time to grow, so she had a temporary 60 ft. x 24 ft. “screen” built. Dwyer told WPTZ-TV a child stood in the neighbor’s driveway often enough to scare her horse and something had to be done. But… she violated zoning laws and since early March 2015, town officials started fining her $200 a day. (As of June 5, 2015, the fines were still accumulating.)

HE REALLY SUCKED

Gary Ashbrook, 31, from East Sussex, liked to inflate condoms with massive amounts of nitrous oxide, after stretching one over his head. In November of 2007, his housemates found him dead on his bed, this time with a condom sucked flat against his face. He’d used three cans of nitrous to blow this prophylactic up, causing suffocation while he “pleasured” himself. (http://www.theargus.co.uk/news/1830867.man_dies_after_internet_sex_game_goes_wrong/)

Thursday, August 13, 2015 –

NO JEWISH OR MUSLIM WINNERS?

The state of Indiana has begun the Hoosier Lottery, offering bacon-scented lottery tickets that give players the chance to win a 20-year supply of pork. The new scratch-off lottery game is called “Bringin’ Home the Bacon.” This game is a partnership with Indiana Pork, a nonprofit group that represents 3,000 Indiana hog farmers. (http://www.nbcnewyork.com/news/weird/Indiana-Lottery-Debuts-Bacon-Scented-Lottery-Tickets-306010971.html)

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDINGS

Old odd examples: (A) “This is the third marriage of the groom. He has also been through World War II.” (B) “After Governor Baldwin watched the lion perform, he was taken to Main Street and fed 25 pounds of raw meat in front of the Cross Keys Theater.” (C) “One man was electrocuted when he came in contact with a live wife.

HE “UNCLOGGED” FINANCIAL NEEDS

During a ceremony June 4, 2015, Anthony Perosi, 56, was presented the top prize in New York’s Power Ball lottery. When asked what he would do now that he had won $136,000,000, Perosi said he planned to relax a little more and other than that he would just go back to work being a plumber. (http://www.nytimes.com/2015/06/05/nyregion/a-136-million-powerball-ticket-stashed-in-a-staten-island-plumbers-basement.html?_r=0)

Wednesday, August 12, 2015 –

DIDN’T WANT A MAN IN HER LIFE?

A woman in Hobbs, New Mexico, awoke to hear noise in her kitchen, where she found Patrick Lynn Waits, 45, baking a potato in her microwave oven. When she told him to leave, Waits instead went outside and began raking leaves. From there the woman promised to pay him… until the police arrived. (http://www.barstoolsports.com/dmv/guy-who-broke-into-a-house-and-then-baked-a-potato-and-raked-their-leaves-is-the-most-pleasant-burglar-ever/)

NO FUN BEING HIMSELF?

Detroit – You probably won’t remember William Street Jr. Now age 64, he’s the imposter who inspired a 1989 award-winning film, “Chameleon Street,” which won a major prize at the 1990 Sundance Film Festival. Convicted two dozen times, he fooled the Detroit Tigers into giving him a tryout. Now, in 2015, he is posing as someone else. He obtained diplomas, transcripts, a U.S. Military Academy class ring, and a doctor’s white coat with the name of William Benn Stratton on it (Stratton isn’t even doctor). Last heard, Street’s in jail, with no bail. (http://news.yahoo.com/man-called-great-impostor-charged-identity-theft-162849988.html)

FORGOT TO DROP-HIS-LAUNDRY

A U.S.-born Israeli soldier will not be punished after all for breaking a rule. The name of the soldier was not released, though he did do a no-no. And what was that he did? He violated the military’s kosher rules by enjoying a pork sandwich while in uniform. (http://www.nytimes.com/aponline/2015/06/02/world/middleeast/ap-ml-odd-israel-pork-stink.html)

THEY CAN “LEARN” LAW IN JAIL

Were you always proud of your grades in school? Two 7th graders in Serbia maybe were not? They stormed their classroom wearing masks and were later arrested for stealing the teacher’s grade book. Police caught them in the Belgrade suburb of Kotez with a replica handgun and knife; charging them with violent behavior, jeopardizing public safety and damage of property. (http://www.nbcnews.com/news/world/armed-7th-graders-storm-classroom-seize-grade-book-n369031)

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDING

“The president of the Chicago Federation of Labor was critically ill at Loyola University Medical Center in Maywood after surgery last week to remove a brain.” From New North News, May 19, 1984.

A BIG BULGE IN HIS PANTS

A 19-year-old, Marlon Alvarez, walked out of Public Pawn and Gun with an assault rifle stuffed down his pants, but the owner of the Florida store tackled him to the ground outside. “By the time he left I noticed a bulge in his pants, so I followed him out,” said owner, Kevin Hughes. “I didn’t want to have an altercation in the store.” (http://www.nbcmiami.com/news/local/Store-Owner-Tackles-Thief-Who-Stuffed-Assault-Rifle-Down-Pants-305412961.html)

DEADLY “PASSION”

“Semelparity” describes suicidal reproduction where all males die after mating. This could eventually cause the extinction of the Tasman Peninsula Dusky Antechinu. Their breeding period is basically two to three weeks of speed-mating, where testosterone-fueled males couple with as many females as possible, for up to 14 hours at a time. (http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/speaking-of-science/wp/2015/06/02/these-marsupials-basically-sex-each-other-to-death/)

YOU GOT AN EIGHT-LEG APPETITE?

A pop-up ‘Pestaurant’ on Queen Street, in Cardiff, England, offers a menu of bugs and insects, featuring roasted locusts, salt and vinegar crickets, scorpion lollies, Mexican spiced meal worm and even cricket cookies. For your information, two billion people around the globe diet on insects. A healthy alternative to meat, many small critters contain four times the protein of chicken. (http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/pop-up-pest-aurant-serves-roasted-locusts-5819096)

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDING

“After the jury convicted a rapist in circuit court last week, Judge Ted Coleman sentenced him to prison `for the rest of your natural life with credit for the 3 days already served.’” The Orlando Sentinel, November 19, 1986.

HEADING FOR EXTINCTION

Though it’s well understood Pasteurella and Clostridia bacteria have exacerbated the number of deaths among the endangered species saiga antelopes, the bacteria is not lethal unless the animal’s immune system is already weakened. The root cause of these deaths remains a mystery. In 1984 some 100,000 died in a short period of time. And, after the Soviet Union’s dissolution, uncontrolled poaching reduced the saiga population about 95% in the 1990s, leaving only some 50,000 alive worldwide. (http://www.latimes.com/science/sciencenow/la-sci-sn-saiga-antelope-die-off-20150531-story.html)

EARNS EVEN MORE SITTING DOWN

Sarah Reign, 26, is a security guard in New York City. What’s unusual is the business she operates at home during free time. With her computer and camera she earns around $1,500 (£1,000) a month eating chocolate cake and smearing it all over her face, then she smothers herself with butter and puts it in her belly button… and even breaks wind, if requested. Some paying viewers even visit to enjoy being sat on by this very overweight lady; but she says she always wears undergarments. (http://metro.co.uk/2015/04/08/woman-makes-money-breaking-wind-and-eating-for-men-on-camera-5140545/)

ONE PERSON’S TRASH IS…

After her husband’s death, a Silicon Valley woman cleaned out her home and dumped a bunch of the junk at a local recycle center. Among that “junk” it turns out was a first-generation Apple computer, one of the desktop computers put together by Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak in 1976. Last heard, Clean Bay Area recycle center was looking for the woman in order to split the $200,000 it sold for. (http://recode.net/2015/05/31/woman-unwittingly-discards-vintage-apple-computer-worth-200000/)

Monday, August 10, 2015 –

ONLY A TIP OF THE ICEBERG

Teddy Lichtschein and Eliezer Scheiner operate some of the most poorly rated nursing homes in Texas. Over the last three years they’ve been fined more than $800,000. Examples of mistreatment: One patient waited four days to have a broken leg set; Another was given food he couldn’t chew, and choked to death; A woman age 80, suffering rectal cancer, screamed two weeks before attendants called her doctor. (http://www.dallasnews.com/news/metro/20150530-public-hospitals-help-nursing-home-operators-get-federal-funds.ece)

OKAY, THEN

Robby Dawkins, a Northern England self-proclaimed faith healer, claims a worshipper, Matt Catlow, died during an April 2015 sermon he was preaching, the moment he mentioned resurrecting the dead. Saying he saw a strong demon in the now dead man; “I began to declare the resurrection life of Jesus Christ over him,” declaring this brought him back to life. But Catlow’s sister set up a Facebook page to refute Dawkins, saying he’s a charlatan, using her brother’s medical condition to promote his books and ministry. (http://www.democraticunderground.com/1218201704)

HE GOT CARRIED AWAY

Prominent human rights lawyer Seth Richardson, from Sydney, Australia, was stolen inside his coffin, along with the hearse, while his body waited to be transported into the funeral. But no big deal, thanks to the deceased’s brother, Tobias Richardson, who followed the stolen vehicle into a cul-de-sac, where the mentally unstable driver gave up. (http://www.neatorama.com/2014/11/30/Hearse-with-Deceased-Inside-Stolen-from-Funeral/)

EVERYBODY DIES FROM SOMETHING

One of China’s great poets, Li Bai, (701-762 A.D.), died in Dangtu, Anhui province. What’s strange is something he wrote and the way some say he died. What he wrote was “Alone and Drinking Under the Moon.” It is rumored incorrectly he’d drown, falling off a boat when he was drunk, while looking at the moon’s reflection in the water. In reality, he died at a relative’s house. (http://www.britannica.com/EBchecked/topic/338660/Li-Bai)

WELL, HE TOOK A STAB AT IT

December 8, 1996, in Dahlonega, GA, ROTC cadet Nick Berrena, 20, was stabbed to death by fellow cadet Jeffrey Hoffman, 23. Following instructions from Berrena, Hoffman was helping him prove that a knife could not penetrate the flak vest he wore; but it did. (http://articles.philly.com/1997-08-08/news/25566852_1_cadet-abuse-fund-raising)

HAY DUST MAKES CHEESE SNEEZE

You like eating Swiss cheese? Ever wonder why it has holes? Switzerland’s Agroscope institute has found if milk is too clean, the holes will not appear. Therefore, with barns now super-sanitized, it is necessary to add microscopically small hay particles. The number and sizes of these holes is controlled by the amount of hay dust added. (http://www.nytimes.com/2015/05/29/world/europe/switzerland-scientists-find-the-secret-to-the-holes-in-swiss-cheese-hay-dust.html?_r=0)

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDING

“In one edition of today’s Food Section, an inaccurate number of jalapeno peppers was given for Jeanette Crowley’s Southwestern chicken salad recipe. The recipe should call for two, not 21, jalapeno peppers.” (#15 – http://humour.petersadlon.com/show_joke2.adp?joke_id=2386&category_id=0)

A BIG-MOUTHED DRINKING BUDDY

Guillermo Reyes was driving home from a bar in Mexico City when he got stuck in line for a DUI traffic stop check. And, he might’ve been able to continue home, if not for a voice in his back seat repeating in Spanish “Está borracho, borracho!” (i.e. “He is drunk, drunk!”) The police gave Reyes a Breathalyzer test, which he flunked, and was taken to jail… along with that big mouthed buddy, his parrot. (http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/parrot-rats-driver-cops-drunk-article-1.1578921)

YOU’D PROBABLY RATHER DIE

If you are a single and lonely lady, you might want to talk to Emma Morano. She tells the New York Times she feels being single for the last 77 years has helped her to live until now, age 115. She’s believed to be the oldest person in Europe, and the 5th oldest in the world; explaining, simply, “I didn’t want to be dominated by anyone.” (http://www.newser.com/story/202799/secret-of-oldest-european-raw-eggs-no-men.html)

Tuesday, August 4, 2015 –

COULD’VE GONE THE OTHER WAY

A lady in Wisconsin named Lois Matykowski, lost her diamond wedding ring some six years ago. Then, last June, her ten-year-old dog Tucker swallowed a Popsicle stick. Her vet told her to feed the animal a Vaseline sandwich to help him throw up stick, which she did and he did. Two days later Tucker threw up again and this time the vomit contained her ring. The stick apparently dislodged the ring. Now her friends jokingly say she has a dog that pukes up diamonds.

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDING

“Our newspaper carried the notice last week that Mr. Oscar Hoffnagle is a defective on the police force. This was a typographical error. Mr. Hoffnagle is, of course, a detective on the police farce.” (http://humour.petersadlon.com/show_joke2.adp?joke_id=2386&category_id=0)

AND MAY A CAR RUN HIM OVER

Denmark’s Radio station 24syv, a private station supported by fees from listeners, recently fulfilled a public service mandate by hosting a program to discuss animal welfare. But, they lost listeners and supporters when the host of that morning program used a bicycle pump to beat to death a nine-week-old rabbit named Allan.

Monday, August 3, 2015 –

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDING

“IMPORTANT NOTICE: If you are one of hundreds of parachuting enthusiasts who bought our Easy Sky Diving book, please make the following correction: on page 8, line 7, the words ‘state zip code’ should have read ‘pull rip cord.’” (For those taking a crash-course in parachuting?) (http://humour.petersadlon.com/show_joke2.adp?joke_id=2386&category_id=0)

WIPED-OUT BY TOILET PAPER

When Cheryl Crausewell, of Dora, Alabama, found pranksters had “toilet-papered” the trees in her yard, she and her family tried but failed to reach it all. Anxious to clean up, they decided to try small fires, which set the lawn on fire. The result was flames that surrounded a propane gas tank linked to a grill. The video at WBRC myfoxal.com shows the total damage, including the loss of their home.

COULD HE PLAY FOR THE NBA?

Ladies, if you’re looking for a man you can look up too, you might consider giving this lonely India man, Dharmendra Singh, a chance? At age 32, he fears he will never find a woman who can love him the way he is. He’s8’ 1” (2.4 m) tall – only two inches shorter than the world’s tallest man, 8’3”. (http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/relationships/indias-tallest-mans-struggle-to-find-love/story-fnet09y4-1227371465365)

Sunday, August 2, 2015 –

GOOD NEWS, BAD NEWS

Though women usually outlive men, Mark Behrends of Nebraska, at age 110, was at least the oldest proven male in the USA. Good news is this supercentenarian was confident the reason he lived so long was his daily consumption of beer. Downside was, all these years he only drank one beer each day, at around 3:00 pm, and never more. Mr. Behrends passed away June 13, 2015. (http://www.wcnc.com/story/news/features/2015/05/21/110-year-old-mans-tip-for-longevity-beer/27726813/)

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDING

“We apologize to our readers who received, through an unfortunate computer error, the chest measurements of members of the Female Wrestlers Association instead of the figures on the sales of soybeans to foreign countries.” (http://humour.petersadlon.com/show_joke2.adp?joke_id=2386&category_id=0)

TRY SWEET-FLAVOR KITTY TREATS?

Poor Lenny the cat has a social problem which got him returned to Scottsville Veterinary Adoptions in Scottsville, New York. “His” Facebook update said, “Hello! I was returned today because I fart too much. I am a 19-month-old neutered male and would love to be your smelly cuddle cat.” Lenny has since found a new home.

Saturday, August 1, 2015 –

WHY SHOULD LAW LIMIT LOVE?

When Bill Novak and Norman MacArthur moved from New York to Philadelphia some 20 years ago, the state of Pennsylvania would not recognize their domestic partnership. So, even though he was only 2 years younger, in 2000 Novak adopted MacArthur as his son, reducing inheritance tax liabilities. Now ages 78 and 76, and after 50 years of “living in sin,” that law was lifted, allowing this couple to share the phrase “until death do we part.” (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3093168/Gay-couple-adoption-vacated-marry.html)

A REINFORCED BARBARIC PRACTICE

A Florida mother, Heather Hironimus, refused to allow her baby son to be “mutilated” by a circumcision, and fought her husband for four years, one of those years in court. Unable to control her anger in front of the judge, Heather was sent to jail. Next, she was forced to sign an agreement to let her young son suffer this procedure. (Only later, as adults, should males make this decision for themselves.) (http://rt.com/usa/261357-court-circumcision-mother-prison/)

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDING

From theSoviet Weekly: “There will be a Moscow Exhibition of Arts by 150.000 Soviet Republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the past two years.”

HE CAN START OVER, IN JAIL

Lots of folks on Facebook share good news with friends and strangers, alike; but not Canadian Randy Janzen. CBC reported May 8, 2015, he’d posted, “Now my family is pain free and in heaven,” while admitting he killed his 19-year-old daughter, Emily, his wife, Laurel, and his sister, Shelly.

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDINGS

(A) St. Petersburg Evening Independent: “There are no national temperatures today due to transmission difficulties.” (B) “The juror never was asked if he had been molested by either defense or prosecution attorneys.” (C) “Colorado’s wildlife officers are investigating the second death of a bull moose.” (Must’ve been a Christian moose?)

GOOD BEHAVIOR? GOOD BEHAVIOR?!

May 21, 2015, The Dallas Morning News reported Corey Lee Caldwell, 42, faced six counts of burglary in Plano. Last month, he was indicted on five counts of burglary in Coppell and Dallas, and, in 2007, accused of more than 200 burglaries in Dallas County. Sentenced in 2010 to 60 years, he was released only four years later, in 2014, for good behavior. (http://crimeblog.dallasnews.com/2015/05/suspected-evening-burglar-indicted-in-cases-out-of-plano-dallas-coppell.html/)

HE LATER VOTED FOR A DIVORCE

A Phoenix, Ariz., judge has sentenced Holy Nicole Soloman, age 31, to three-and-one-half years in prison… for injuring her husband by running over him with an SUV in 2012. This occurred several days after President Barack Obama was re-elected. Authorities say Soloman chased her husband through a parking lot, before running him over, for not voting against the U.S. leader’s return. (http://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2015/may/21/arizona-woman-sentenced-ran-over-non-voting-husband)

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDING

“Because of a telephone transcription error, an article yesterday about Mary Allison Graves, a lawyer, included an erroneous description. The first sentence should have begun, “Attorney Mary Allison Graves,” not “A tiny Mary Allison graves.” Ms. Graves is 5 foot 7.” (https://www.facebook.com/permalink.php?story_fbid=10151920538276677&id=248365476676&stream_ref=5)

BET YOU DON’T GIVE A DARN

Once known as Buford, Wyoming, population 1, this unincorporated community’s name was changed to PhinDeli Town Buford in 2013, after being bought by two Vietnam men. The new owners sell PhinDeli Fine CoffeeESPRESSO, imported from Vietnam, in the convenience store. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PhinDeli_Town_Buford,_Wyoming)

NO WAY TO “LIVE” A LIFE

According to The New York Times, May 18, 2015, Nurse Aruna Shanbaug, 66, died at King Edward Hospital in Mumbai, India, a week after catching pneumonia. She had really stopped living on November 27, 1973. On that date, while visiting a basement lab in that same hospital, she was choked with a metal chain and raped, leaving her in a vegetative state for the next 42 years. (http://theync.com/forum/general-chat/current-events-news/indian-nurse-dies-after-42-years-in-a-coma-following-rape.htm)

NOBODY LISTENED

In 1981, at age 4, Jonathan Magbie was hit by a drunk-driver and left paralyzed from the neck down and in pain for life, requiring private nursing care up to 20 hours a day. Then, some 22 years later, in April 2003, still suffering, Magbie was “caught” inside a car containing one marijuana joint and a gun. In September 2004, he was sentenced to 10 days inside a Washington, D.C. jail; where, without a ventilator, he died 4 days later. (http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A10798-2004Oct29.html)

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDINGS

(A) “The underground parking garage will probably never see the light of day.” (B) “Fifty-five percent of young people looking for their first jobs are unemployed.” (C) “The judge sentenced the killer to die in the electric chair for the second time.”

MISC. NEWSPAPER MIS-WORDINGS

(A.) “Vincent Charles, a 14 year Secret Service veteran, said ‘The White House has always attracted the mentally ill.’” (B.) “Smith was one of 10 Dallas businessmen robbed and brutally beaten with aluminum baseball bats from October to January.” (C.) “This evening’s meeting of the Clairvoyance Society has been canceled due to unforeseen circumstances.”

HE SHOULD BE ASHAMED

A Changsha, China, “party guy,” with the surname Yuan, enjoyed life until an auto accident put him in a hospital. There, personnel trying to locate Yuan’s family, ended up with 17 females between the ages of 20 and 40, each claiming to be his girlfriend, and allowing them to discover each-others’ existence. Also, while bilking his girlfriends out of money, he took some $40,000 (¥250,000) from his ex-wife.

YOU NEED A JOB, KILLING?

In May 2015, Saudi Arabia’s Ministry of Civil Service began advertising for eight additional swordsmen to conduct executions, lob the hands off thieves, and perform similar duties. As of the 19th, they’ve executed 85 people, nearly the same number put to death in all of 2014. (http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2015/05/19/saudi-executioners-sought/27571071/)

HOPE SHE DIDN’T HURT HER NECK

Susan O’Brien, age 29, was taking part in a 12.5-mile cross-country race near Wellington, New Zealand, in May 2015, when she took a wrong turn and became disorientated. Totally lost, with night approaching and heavy rain moving in, this mother of an 8-month-old daughter buried herself in dirt for warmth, and for “food” drank her own breast milk. (http://news.sky.com/story/1481583/lost-runner-drinks-own-breast-milk-to-survive)

FINDING LOVE TWICE IN A MONTH?

A single mother of twins in Paterson, N.J., has won in court, and will receive $28 weekly child support. The money pays for one child only, since DNA tests proved the twins have different fathers. Passaic County Superior Court Judge Sohail Mohammed found two other court cases nationally; caused when the women had sexual intercourse with two men in the same menstrual cycle and the two eggs were fertilized separately. (http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/new-jersey-twins-fathers-judge-rules-article-1.2214583)

A NON-RETIRED BUSINESS MAN

A 70-year-old Philadelphia man, living in a suburban Philadelphia assisted-living facility, has lost his housing subsidy. Poor guy, you say? Well, hold your grief. After a prostitute was found under his bed, it was learned he paid for sex by bootlegging liquor to other elderly folks living there. (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3077186/Elderly-man-prostitute-bed-loses-housing-subsidy.html)

A SHEEPISH VIEWING SELECTION

With so much different programming on television these days, you probably think you’ve seen it all. But you have not. On May 14-15, 2015 (from a farm in Skagafjordur), Icelandic public TV network, RUV, aired 24 hours of live sheep birthing to give the country’s residents “insight into the traditional farming life.” (http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2015/05/15/Icelandic-public-TV-network-airs-24-hours-of-sheep-birthing/6141431717757/)

CHANGE YOUR VACATION PLANS?

Bet you’ve walk along a beautiful beach while collecting sea shells? Well, while Ron Smith was walking near the Cotton Bayou Beach access in Orange Beach, Alabama, he thought he’d found a seat cushion; which turned out to be a 10-pound package of marijuana, worth $8,000. WECT-TV reported another package of marijuana, weighing 12 pounds, washed up along a beach in North Carolina.

SORRY MOM, NOTHING PERSONAL

English cattle farmer Tommy Moyles was extremely proud of his prize breeding bull, until, during one mating session, the animal damaged his “primary breeding appendage” and had to be replaced with another, younger male. Problem was, before release, the new bull’s mother had to be removed to eliminate the reproductive problems caused by inbreeding. (Phooey!) (http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/prize-bull-breaks-penis-after-5706434)

THAT’S PUUURFECTLY AWFUL

A video made public by People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, taken at Oklahoma City’s Harding Charter Preparatory High School, shows some eight students from biology class “dancing” dead cats’ bodies up and down to the music beat of the popular Meow Mix cat food jingle. A “whistleblower” alerted PETA after students posted the video on social media.

THEY FAILED TO GET FLU SHOTS?

Because of deadly avian flu viruses in May 2015, the biggest egg producer in the U.S., Center Fresh Group, killed and rid themselves of some 5.5 million laying hens, housed in 26 metal barns. That accounted for nearly 17 percent of the nation’s poultry that either died from bird flu or were euthanized to prevent its spread. (http://www.farminguk.com/World/Egg-farms-hit-hard-as-bird-flu-affects-millions-of-hens_10595.html 5-15=15)

CARE TO GUESS WHY HE FASTED?

June 18, 2010, after 25 years on death row, Ronnie Lee Gardner, 49, was the first man to die by firing squad in Utah in 14 years. His last meal was steak, lobster tail, apple pie, vanilla ice cream and 7-Up soda. Strangely, though, no food crossed his lips for the last 48 hours of life, perhaps to save embarrassment from “messing in his pants” while being shot? (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/northamerica/usa/7837003/Ronnie-Lee-Gardner-put-to-death-by-firing-squad.html)

HE COULD’VE BARED BEAR BRUISES

Many folks who drink have done something stupid. On May 11, 2015, the North Adams (Mass.) Police Department posted the following on Facebook: “The North Adams Police Department is urging everyone to NOT chase bears through the woods with a dull hatchet, drunk.” Nicknamed “the hatchet man,” the drunk was taken into custody to sober up. His name was not released. (https://www.facebook.com/permalink.php?id=201279173262612&story_fbid=902884739768715)

WHY NOT?

Vienna, Austria – To emphasize that city’s open mindedness, in preparation for the month of May 2015 Eurovision contest, they spent €63,000 (US$70,779) to replace 120 pedestrian crossing street light indicators, to show the images of male and female, as well as gay and lesbian couples in the standard colors of green and red. (http://rt.com/news/257929-vienna-gay-traffic-lights/).

A MAD-DOG DICTATOR

Have you ever dozed-off during a business meeting? If so, did you get into trouble? Well, North Korea’s Defense Minister, Hyon Yong-chol, did go to sleep during a meeting. And, “to teach him a lesson,” his boss, and leader of North Korea, Kim Jong-un, invited a few hundred people to watch his ex-minister put back to sleep with the help of anti-aircraft fire on April 30, 2015. (http://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-32716749)

[][][][][][][][]

Volume I of Weird, Bizarre and Unusual [Kindle Edition] is available on Amazon.com – Volume II will be coming soon, with Volume III, IV and V to follow.